Monday, September 19, 2016

Its staying.... at least for now

Visited the old house today. To my surprise they repainted everything but the mural. My mom said they couldn't bring themselves to paint over it. They don't know the history of these walls or what they mean to me. But I was shocked to say the least. At least for now it will stay... only to delay the day that this house belongs to someone else and I'm sure by then this mural will be painted over.

Saturday, September 17, 2016

Winks

She's sending me signs like crazy! I saw a video on Facebook of some new card game app thing. It looked pretty cool. I didn't have time to watch the whole thing the other day but saved it to show my kids which I thought they would like. So we are watching the video and at the very end we see this. 
Yup a wink. Yesterday I heard her name in a song on the radio. And today I got this message from an intuitive friend. She drew this card for me.
Couldn't be more spot on. I needed to hear this today. I know what I'm seeing are definite signs. 

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

A definite wink

I was at Target just a little while ago and bought some baby food. I realized got something and went back. I got in the same line as before but now a different girl was working the register. Just before I was done checking out I heard a target employee a couple of registers down say "Hey Genesis!" I instantly looked up to see who she was talking to. Suddenly my cashier replied! My cashier out of all the cashiers was named Genesis. I took a horrible photo of her name tag but none the less there it is. 
She def was giving me a wink on my birthday. Since I wasn't sure if it was a wink earlier she wanted me to know it was.

Maybe a wink

Today is my 33rd birthday. I saw something pretty incredible this morning. I saw a beam of light just shooting straight down from the sky. See?
Pretty neat huh? It may or may not be a wink... But it seemed pretty special especially on my birthday. Special things make me think of my girls. So yeah sure... I'll call it a wink cuz why the heck not. 

Monday, September 12, 2016

A new milestone

I hit a new milestone. I attended my first girl baby shower since having N. I wasn't sure how I would feel. My friend had announced she was pregnant with a girl not long after Naya was born. I didn't feel that stab that I usually feel when I hear these types of announcements. Actually attending the shower wasn't hard either. Like not at all. Perhaps I'm over those feelings since now I have "daughters"? I'm not sure. But here are some photos from yesterday. 

This last photo is me and my sister (with N). She also just announced to me she is expecting as well. She's very early still, around 6 weeks I believe. The possibility of her having a girl is no longer something that hurts me. At least so far it hasn't. Perhaps N brought more healing to me than I thought. But anyway, my friend who is having a daughter is naming her Emberly, thus the "E" at the baby shower. It also made me think of Exodus. Brought a smile to my face.

In other news, my husband had a vasectomy on the 1st. So that's it for baby making for us. I know this is the right choice for us, but I'm not gonna lie... Part of me is a little sad there won't be anymore baby bumps or wrinkly newborns but on to the next. I'm liking this new chapter of my life so far. 

Saturday, September 10, 2016

Winks, winks and more winks

Went to Target today and we noticed letter "G's" everywhere. I thought it may have been a coinsidence but then I saw a dragonfly on a card right in front of me. We even saw a "G" at the register. 
Then we went to the old house to pick up some mail and this was in front.
Amazing! Then when we got home we saw that not one but two cars also were a Genesis. Amazing! My girl really wants me to know she's near. Perhaps my birthday next week???

Saturday, September 3, 2016

A donation

It's been a loooong time coming. I had been holding on to my wedding dress from my first marriage for way to long. I don't even know why I had it in the closet still. I wore it once. On May 29th, 2004. It has been in my closet ever since. I wish I could show you what it looked like in its entirety but I actually just threw away all my wedding photos. (Yes I JUST got rid of that during the move when I found them.) I however do have this gem. I love this photo because of how good my grandmother, Abilla, looked. This was just before she started to go downhill. But you can see part of the dress.
So with this move it only just gave me more motivation to finally get rid of this "baggage" and release the weight of this... Physically and emotionally. I found an organization that takes donated wedding dresses and makes burial gowns for children out of your dress. I just submitted my donation today.
I love that this is the first thing I'm doing in memory of both Genesis and Exodus. I'm told it takes about 9 months to hear back from them and they will show me just a few items of what the dress was made into. Unfortunately they can't show me everything that was made from it. But they are sharing my email to the family that gets the children's gown and they may choose to reach out to me one day. So although I may have only worn this once, parts of my dress will go to children who will wear it for all eternity. Wow. What an honor to be able to play a small part in this. 
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